Recent Comments

8/19/20, 9:07 PM
I'm very confused by the slippage in gender pronouns and signifiers when describing Alexei. Is this an adaptation of an M/F or F/F story that needs more editing?
Martin
8/19/20, 8:55 PM
@UchihaDEMS: Since you didn't seem to respond, I published and approved this story in your community series, I hope you don't mind. Let me know if you have any objections. Martin.
Swizzington
8/19/20, 7:47 PM
Actually, of all the things you listed, the only one that doesn't interest me is musky smells. Indeed, shaving is one of my main interests :-)
8/19/20, 7:41 PM
All fair critiques, Swizzington. But I think this story's going for fetishes that you're not really into, not only shaving and body hair, but also musky smells, muscle, and cum. It also doesn't have a humiliation element, which I know is something that you tend to include, but that is a real turn-off for me. Literally, I think it's different strokes for different folks!
8/19/20, 7:16 PM
The punishment 'Ding' was a great plot device! Loved the story!
8/19/20, 7:10 PM
I brought up John is a Good Boy and short is good
8/19/20, 6:46 PM
I knew I was going to get that critique. Someone in the "Master of the House" thread brought up Hypnonail's 1999 story ["John is a Very Good Boy"](https://mcstories.com/GoodBoy/GoodBoy.html) which is the same length as this (2000 words). And as I reread it, I found myself feeling nostalgic for some of those early gay mind control stories which managed to pack a lot of action and intensity of language into a short amount of words. Partly because of the pacing, Hypnonail's story turns me on in ways that Swizzington's story unfortunately does not. However, I do think you have to read a short piece like this one differently than you would read a 8000 word chapter. There's not a lot of filler here, so you have to read it more like poetry than technical prose.
8/19/20, 6:41 PM
I liked this! wouldve l
Anonymous
8/19/20, 4:56 PM
I’m a massive fan of some of your “homage” pieces so it pains me to say this, but in this instance I’m not sure you’ve hit the mark. I get that you’re trying to capture the essence of the original work and condense it down to a shorter story, but the reduced work count means that key story beats end up feeling rushed
Swizzington
8/19/20, 4:48 PM
Tom, probably not :-) My philosophy is: "write the stories you would enjoy reading," and personally, I don't like stories that have photos attached. I find it distracting. Plus I like to give the reader wiggle room in how they imagine the characters.